Trick Or Treat

Welcome to October. It's my most favorite time of the year. The leaves are turning, the air is crisp. And Halloween is just around the corner. I think at one time or another, each of us took one of those little cardboard boxes out with us when we went trick or treating. Collecting donations for UNICEF. In case you don't know what I'm talking about UNICEF is a charity organization dedicated to assisting children, not just in the US, but worldwide. Disaster relief, water sanitation, food security and nutrition, vaccines. These are the things that they spend countless hours raising money for. And this year, I'm doing my part as well. I figure if I only raise just one dollar, I can still do some good. Because really, isn't the children that we're leaving the world to? If you have the resources and want to help, feel free. 

Shawnee' Martin for UNICEF

This Breaks My Heart

Seems like we have another Casey Anthony case on our hands. No one reported the baby missing for EIGHTEEN months. And when the mother called CPS to report the child was missing and possibly dead, they screened out the call and the police never got the report. Really? Why?

http://thestir.cafemom.com/in_the_news/149469/no_one_reported_missing_baby

Halloween Movies Worth Watching

Looking for a good scare this Halloween? Skip the dated slasher flicks and pick something with some bite.

John Carpenter's Vampires
Dark Prince: The Story of Dracula ( Not really scary, but a good watch for history buffs.)
An American Werewolf In London
Wolf
The Shining
The Blade Series
Texas Chainsaw Massacre
Halloween (Obviously)
Silent Hill
The Woman In Black
Paranormal Activity
Psycho
The Birds
The Exorcist
The Rite
Bram Stoker's Dracula
Pet Cemetery
'Salem's Lot
IT
Queen of the Damned
Interview With the Vampire
Hellraiser
The Puppetmaster
Warlock
Wish Master
Critters

It's Been A While

Lots of things change in life, while others stay the same. Sometimes we feel like we zip through life when really we are cruising along at a steady pace.

I've done a hefty bit of moving in the last year. Iowa to Utah to Missouri and hopefully soon Nevada. Life is a constant state of transition, that's what makes the ride all the more enjoyable. I'll be updating more often, well as often as I have free time.

Times They Are A'Changin'

A lot has changed since I posted last. Moved to a new state, my almost two year relationship ended, cried more times than I care to remember. As much as I want to keep a positive outlook on things, somehow I just cant. I doubt myself, my worth and whether or not I actually have a purpose. On my best days I feel like a burden to the people that care about me, on my worst I feel like I don't deserve to exist. No one ever said that starting over was easy, but I didn't think it would be this hard. I wish I could go to sleep and wake up to be 10 years old again. To not have a care in the world except for making good grades in school. The last year has been hell for me and already this one doesn't seem to be much better.

Starting over isn't easy, but the character it builds, builds you.

My Dream

Much like Dr. Martin Luther King Jr, I have a dream. I dream of a world evolved past petty violence. Where children can play together without fear. Where a person's income, race, religion, or sexual orientation doesn't define their worth to society. A world in which there is no such thing as homophobia, racism or bigotry. A world where nations don't have need for standing armies to defend themselves from their neighbors. I dream of a world where clean air and water are not things of the past. Where sickness, suffering and poverty don't exist. I dream of a world where social injustice is a foreign concept, and the miscarriage of justice never occurs. I dream of a world where conflict can be resolved with words and not guns. I dream of a world where a mother's rights to her own children can not be severed because she is mentally ill or physically disabled. I guess my dream is of a utopia, where one isn't laughed at for looking at things though a rose colored lens. I dream of a world where love is color blind and not restricted by a governing body telling you who you can and can not marry. I dream of a world where the phrase "with liberty and justice, for all" really means just that, FOR ALL, not just the elite, powerful and rich.

I don't dabble much in politics or religion. Personally I don't care for either one. My dream isn't that different from many others dreams. Safety, acceptance, love, equality. These are things that all mankind, not just American's strive for. It breaks my heart to see a child go without food, clothing or shelter. It breaks my heart to hear on an almost daily basis about youth the world over bullied for daring to be different. Not that long ago, I was one of those kids. Not that long ago, I suffered the careless words of my peers. And not that long ago, I became what I hated. A bully. I tried to fight back and became no better than those that pushed me around and belittled me. I tried telling myself that I was just fighting back. Eventually people became afraid of me. That little thrill of holding even one iota of power was intoxicating. But power is fleeting. Eventually, the anger I held towards the people that had been so cruel gave way to something new. Anger dissipated and I had a new out look. I forgave the childish actions of my aggressors. Not because they had asked forgiveness, but because I had forgotten why I was carrying all this anger. I tried to make amends to those that I had wronged. Some accepted, others did not. I also wanted to show my younger brother that the old hurts of the past could be forgotten, that it was better and healthier just to let it go.Lao Tzu said, " By letting it go it all gets done. The world is won by those who let it go. But when you try and try. The world is beyond the winning. " And that is something that I firmly believe. To those young people that are being bullied for the way they dress, for the music they like, for being unapologetically themselves whether they are gay, straight, lesbian, bisexual or transgendered, for daring to dream and be unique, let me say this, IT GETS SO MUCH BETTER. I know that right now it seems like the end of the world, not having the acceptance of your peers, but all you have to do is accept yourself the way you are. Love yourself, because you are beautiful, precious and unique. Keep your head held high, your chin up and your chest out. One day, you'll look back and laugh.

My message is simply this, if we don't collectively let go of all our hate, our pain, our past failures and shortcomings, how are we to change the world? How can we possibly have hope to not only save ourselves, but save our world? I am proud to say that I am a dreamer. And I believe that a person with a dream, with a singular hope can change not only just what's around them, but the world.

"It's not the size of the dreamer, but the size of the dream." Josh Ryan Evans

Writing

So, I finally got around to watching Game of Thrones. Watched the entire first season in a couple of days. Of course for me that meant hunting for links to full episodes online as I don't have cable. I was quite impressed with the series. And it also sparked my love of  writing. Creative writing that is. I've been writing short stories and essays since I was about seven, but George R.R. Martin's work brought to life made me want to jump back in the saddle so to speak. Fantasy is my genre. It's what I'm good at. I've taken a stab a horror and the work was mediocre at best and an epic disaster at worst. I tried fan fiction, but there is to little leeway with a character that has already been established by another author that it seems an injustice to do anything to alter the character. So, I've decided that it's time for me to write my own book. I plan on doing a chapter at a time, blogging them here and then once it's finished, having it published. At least that's the plan. Keep your fingers crossed, wish me luck and keep your eyes peeled. First chapter should be up within a couple of days, possibly faster if my muse stays with me.

About the IS Foundation | Ian Somerhalder Foundation

Every once in a while someone comes along with a brilliant idea, overwhelming compassion for life outside their own. Today I want to talk about Ian Somerhalder's IS Foundation. Everyone is familiar with Mr. Somerhalder's work as vampire Damon Salvatore on the CW's "Vampire Diaries" based on the books by L.J. Smith. He is also an ardent eco-activist and for that the man deserves a round of applause.  Following is an excerpt from the IS Foundation's mission statement. Impressive.

We are a team, a group of people, who view the environment as an interconnected organism of which we are not separate but a part of. There is no differentiation between all living things: trees, rivers, animals and humans. We are all one interdependent organism.

The global problems and challenges we are facing are infinitely interconnected and co-dependent, therefore our solutions and actions must be enacted in an interconnected manner. There are numerous causes, many campaigns and organizations aiming to encourage change, which includes ending deforestation, planting trees, eliminating pesticides and healing our planet. How many of these organizations or campaigns team up to become a united spirit of change?

Nature does not behave independently. It works in unison with all its elements. Working independently to transform our planet is like trying to playing a violin without strings. Communities of businesses, organizations, people and projects must begin to connect resources and skills to passions and projects. The IS FOUNDATION will behave in full collaborative spirit by joining with other Non-Profit, For-Profit and governing bodies globally.

• Distributing funds and resources towards global conservation, green energy development/deployment and educational tools.
• Creating awareness that global deforestation can be seen as a national/international and global security risk.
• Creating mobility by engaging and supporting of the most powerful, yet disregarded, disrespected and overlooked population on the planet - our youth.
• Ending animal cruelty and promoting programs such as: “species specific sterilization drugs”, transferring and re-training of abandoned animals into assistive and therapy guides.
• Supporting and creating sustainable strategies for “no-kill shelters”. 

•  Upcoming Areas of Focus for the IS Foundation

HABITAT Extinction Deforestation & Reforestation Conservation BioDiversity

ENERGY

• Fuel Transportation Impact Reduction
• Green Technology
• Local Biofuels
• Green Disaster Relief
• Greening the Entertainment Industry
• Empower public participation in legislation

ANIMALS

• Habitat & Extinction
• Cruelty
• Empowerment of NO KILL Shelters
• Sterilization
• Assistive & Therapy Animals

The IS Foundation strives for the involvement of children as well, because really don't we do all this for them? Isn't protecting our Mother Earth about future generations? Because one day I know that I would like to be able to take my grandchildren back to my hometown in Missouri and show them the local heard of wild mustangs and tell them how they used to roam freely on the high plains. Or to be able to let them see a pod of orcas  swimming freely, not confined to a tank that's to small and eventually crushes their spirits. So, from the bottom of my heart, God Bless you Ian for your work. 

Conservation, Recycling and YOU

I am a huge supporter of the effort to conserve America's endangered species, both plant an animal. Due to habitat loss, deforestation, and human encroachment, we are on the brink of losing many varieties of plants and animals. By no means am I knocking the farming industry, because they do provide an important service to everyone, but clearing vast tracts of land for industrial farming is detrimental to our environment and destroys thousands of precious ecosystems, as does littering and dumping waste materials into our rivers, streams and oceans. Think before you toss a cup from a car window or drop a wrapper on the ground, or toss a plastic water bottle that is going to clog a landfill for years. Recycling doesn't take a huge effort. I also advocate composting as means to safely dispose of organic waste material. If you've got a garden, compost makes a great fertilizer. Sierra Club Composting Tips has some great advice if you're new to the composting game. Keystone Endangered Species List from Advocates West has prime examples of American endangered species including wolves, wild mustangs, salmon, sturgeon, caribou, antelope, and goshawks and grizzly bears. So please, for the love of our mother, the Earth, think before you act.

Dreaming

Sometimes I wonder if I'm dreaming.
If I'm moving through life asleep with my eyes wide open.
Words flow past my ears, but they make no sense.
The days and nights ebb and flow like the tide.
I have no sense of time.
Everything is so surreal to me.
Is this real?
Or am I walking in a dream?

More Quotes

All life is an experiment. The more experiments you make, the better. -Ralph Waldo Emerson

Every creature is better alive than dead, men, moose and pine trees, and he that understands it aright will rather preserve it's life than destroy it. -Henry David Thoreau

A #2 pencil and a dream can take you anywhere. -Joyce A. Meyers

Change your thoughts and you change your world. - Norman Vincent Peale

Faith is love taking the form of aspiration. - William Ellery Channing

A kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous. - Ingrid Bergman

Carry out a random act of kindness, with no expectation of reward, safe in the knowledge that one day someone might do the same for you. - Diana, Princess of Wales

Absence from those we love is self from self - a deadly banishment. - William Shakespeare

All wrong doing arises because of mind. If mind is transformed, can wrong doing remain? - Buddah

A man will fight harder for his interests than his rights. - Napoleon Bonaparte

A picture is worth a thousand words. - Napoleon Bonaparte

A revolution can neither be made nor stopped. The only thing that can be done is for one of several of it's children to give it a direction by dint of victories. - Napoleon Bonaparte

As a rule, men worry more about what they can't see than what they can. - Julius Caesar

Experience is the teacher of all things. - Julius Caesar

Fortune, which has a great deal of power in other matters especially in war, can bring about great changes in a situation through very slight forces. - Julius Caesar

Everything that is done in the world is done by hope. - Martin Luther

Europe was created by history. America was created by philosophy. - Margaret Thatcher

I am extraordinarily patient, provided I get my own way in the end. - Margaret Thatcher

If you can't feed a hundred people, then just feed one. - Mother Teresa

A riot is the language of the unheard. - Martin Luther King, Jr.

A genuine leader is not a searcher for consensus, but a molder of consensus. - Martin Luther King, Jr.

Poetry is the evidence of life. If your life is burning well, poetry is just the ash. - Leonard Cohen

The last refuge of the insomniac is the sense of superiority to the sleeping world. - Leonard Cohen

Any startling piece of work  has a subversive element in it, a delicious element often. Subversion is only disagreeable when it manifests in political or social activity. - Leonard Cohen

As always, feel free to add to the list.

You Haven't Seen the Last of Me

The last few years of my life have been literal and utter Hell. I have hit my lowest of lows and seen my darkest days. But a ray of light came to me from the most unexpected place. I was watching the movie Burlesque and there was a very inspired and inspiring song sung by Cher. I'd like to share it.

This song has meant a lot to me, and helped me see that yes, I'm down now, but I'll eventually get back up again.

Creativity

Some folks know and some don't, that I am a highly creative person. My preferred medium is writing, clearly. Ever since I was old enough to hold a pencil, and write half-way coherent sentences, I've been coming up with stories. Scary stories, humorous stories, and things that border on erotica. Sometimes I have an idea for a story and then it evolves on it's own during the writing process, almost like an organic being instead of words on paper. But, I think I'm going to start posting some of my work here. Not whole stories, but maybe some fan fictions or something. 

More Movie Reviews

I recently had the pleasure of watching Captain America. I was a little worried about the movies casting at first because Chris Evans will always be Johnny Storm for a LOT of people. I mean, he did a great job in that role, and the subsequent roles after that. I loved Push, but let's not get off topic... Captain America. Steve Rogers is a literal 98 pound asthmatic to desperately wants to join the US Army. Not to kill a bunch of bad guys, or be a hero. Because he wants to stand up to a bully. And let's face it, who was a bigger bully than Adolph Hitler? But, because of his size, and his various health issues, poor Steve is labeled unfit for service and sent home. That doesn't mean that he gives up. The plucky lad tries to enlist a total of 5 times before he is noticed by a doctor and inducted into a top secret program that is trying to create the perfect super soldier. He impresses Colonel Chester Phillips, played by Tommy Lee Jones, with his willingness to throw himself in harms way to save his fellow soldiers, and they decide that he has the perfect qualities to become the super soldier. Under the supervision of Dr. Abraham Erskine (Stanley Tucci) and Howard Stark (Dominic Cooper), he's injected with a serum that finally allows Rogers to become all that he wanted to be. I won't give away the plot. The effects are great. Chris Evans totally broke out of his Johnny Storm persona and made Cap his own. If you haven't seen this one yet, I don't know what you're waiting for. And make sure you stick around after the credits. Trust me, it's worth it..... Happy watching.

Quotes

Nothing makes me happier than finding a good quote. Well a venti green tea latte from Starbucks comes close. So, here are a few of my favorites.


"One good thing about music, when it hits you, you feel no pain." Bob Marley


"Intense love does not measure. It just gives." Mother Teresa


"In the practice of tolerance, one's enemy is his best teacher." His Holiness, the Dalai Lama


"Being powerful is like being a lady. If you have to tell people you are, you aren't." Margaret Thatcher


"A coward is incapable of exhibiting love; it is the prerogative of the brave." Mohandas Ghandi


"A man who was completely innocent,offered himself as a sacrifice for the good of others, including his enemies, and became the ransom of the world. It was a perfect act." Mohandas Ghandi


"He who knows when he can fight and when he can not will be victorious." Sun Tzu


"By letting it all go, it all gets done. The world is won by those who let it go. But when you try and try, the world is beyond winning." Lao Tzu


"Affection is responsible for nine-tenths of whatever solid and durable happiness there is in our lives." C.S. Lewis


"Courage is found in the unlikeliest of places." J.R.R. Tolkien


"I'm willing to admit that I may not always be right, but I am never wrong." Samuel Goldwyn


Feel free to add to the list.

Caged

I feel like a prisoner.
Trapped in a Hell no one can see.
Caged within my own mind.
Bound by scars and hateful words.
Trapped by mistakes and pain.
I keep a smile on my face all the time.
The consummate actress.
You don't get to see the pain.
You can't imagine the depth or breadth.
Don't even try.
I'll be caged inside the rest of my life.
Mourning the loss of something I'll never regain.


Shawnee J. Martin 8/9/11

I Can't Wait

The Fall movie season is quickly approaching. For me, that means walking in the cold or taking the skywalk to navigate the downtown area. But, allow me to show you what I'm looking forward to....

The Three Musketeers....

It's the freaking Three Musketeers, in 3D! Logan Lerman looks like a good fit as D'Artagnan.


Immortals.....

Let's see, my favorite genre, the sword and sandal. We've got Henry Cavill (who I can't wait to see suit up for the Superman reboot), Luke Evans (look for him in the Three Musketeers as Aramis) Frieda Pinto, Mickey Rourke, Kellan Lutz. This is either going to be epic, or a major epic fail. From everything I've seen, looks epic to me.


Sherlock Holmes 2: A Game of Shadows.....

He's baaaaaack. Robert Downey Jr returns as the wisecracking detective Sherlock Holmes with Jude Law's Watson at his side. Noomi Rapace comes in as Sim, a Gypsy fortune teller and Jared Harris as Prof. Moriarty. Should be great.




The Devil's Double....

Dominic Cooper portrays Uday Hussien, lunatic son of Saddam Hussien, and his body double Latif. Looks like the startling look inside the fall of a regime. 






Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Pt. 1

The gang's all here for the first half of the final installment of Stephanie Meyer's tale of vampire love. I was initially unhappy with breaking this movie into two parts, but much like Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, there's to much of the plot that is important and can not be cut. I just wish the parts would be released much closer together.

Fragility

I've learned many things over the years. The fragility and sanctity of life is one of them. How pointless and inane fighting only causes more pain, more fighting. So, I am adopting a new outlook on things. Trying to be more go with the flow and Zen like. Recently, I set aside old hurts and basically called a peace treaty with an old friend. We'd had a falling out (I'll spare you the messy details), but after talking to her for a few hours, I felt an inner peace and a sense of ease that I hadn't felt in a while. This feeling of no matter what happens, I can live past the things and people that hurt me. As the adage goes, "To err is human, but to forgive, divine." I don't want petty things to weigh me down. Life is to short to cling to every hurt, to every sharp word or turned back. Letting go of my own hurt feelings was one of the healthiest things that I have done. I regained a friend and that makes me very happy.

Life is like a butterfly.
Beautiful, colorful, magical.
At times it's like a thunderstorm.
Dark, but still there is light.
Life is like good lemonade.
Sweet and tart at once.
We all have our parts to play.
Some of us just get lost along the way.
That is when we use our friends
Like stars to guide us back to our path.

Summer Movie Review

2011, the summer of some pretty big movies.

First off was Thor. Another Marvel movie. The almost audible groan was heard world wide when it was announced. I went to see it regardless. Me, I'm a comic book geek. Have been since I was seven and old enough to read and comprehend the panels. Thor was true to the comics, and paid homage to the Norse mythos at the same time. Anthony Hopkins, Chris Hemsworth, Natalie Portman, Stellan Skarsgard and Tom Hiddleston worked well together. When this one comes out on dvd, it's going directly into my collection.

Priest: I saw Thor and Priest in the same night. Both in Dolby 3D. If you are a fan of vampires, like a twist on a "classic" monster, this is for you. Set in a post apocalyptic world where mankind has sealed it's self off into massive walled cities following a war with vampires that waged for centuries, a warrior caste of the Church ended the war. But the cost was that after they made the world safe for humanity, they became social pariahs. The title character, The Priest gets word that his niece has been abducted by vampires. He defies the Church's authority and takes on the quest to rescue her. Same old plot right? Neo-apocalyptic Dracula? Wrong. While at times resembling a spaghetti western, Priest was a excellent movie. The fight choreography was superb. Paul Bettany, Maggie Q, Cam Gigandet, and Karl Urban are great on screen. The only flop for me was Stephen Moyer. First he plays Bill Compton on HBO's True Blood, and then a vampire victim in Priest? I think that after four seasons thus far of having fangs, you'd want to branch out. Not that I am a particular fan of his anyway. Over all, the movie is great. But if you startle easy, might shy from the 3D.

Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides- Fourth in Disney's POTC franchise. We have a cross dressing Penelope Cruz within the first 45 minutes of the movie, doing a pretty good job of channeling her inner Jack Sparrow. In a convoluted plot that involves mermaids tears, bottled ships and Blackbeard, Captain Jack finds himself in the middle of yet another epic adventure. This time to stop dread pirate Blackbeard from finding the Fountain of Youth and becoming immortal. Great graphics, sluggish storyline, but great repartee between Jack and Angelica. Bruckheimer is milking his cash cow for all it's worth. It's an enjoyable movie, but not stellar.

X-Men First Class: Finally a backstory as to how the Xavier Institute for Gifted Children came to be. As if decades of comic books never gave us that story, over and over again. Wait, why am I complaining? I LOVED this movie. Professor X in the prime of his youth, trying to save the world, pick up a few chicks and help fellow mutants come into their own. I was happily surprised by the casting of Brit actor Nicholas Hoult (About A Boy, A Single Man, Skins UK) as Hank McCoy. The Wolverine cameo is HILARIOUS.

Overall grades:

Thor: A

Priest: A

Pirates of the Caribbean On Stranger Tides: B-

X-Men First Class: A+

It's Been A While.....

While I've been off, God knows where, the world keeps turning. Things happen, the world changes, people change. Like the rest of America, I've followed the Casey Anthony case. Not because I was a morbidly curious piranha, but because the woman showed absolutely no remorse about not reporting her only child missing for over a month. In fact, she made excuses as to why she never reported little Caylee "missing". I know the jury returned a not guilty verdict because they say that they state didn't prove their case beyond a shadow of a reasonable doubt. But really, not reporting your child missing for over 31 days, making compound lies to explain where she was, inventing a fictitious nanny, who's name and address you probably lifted from a phone book, and nearly driving your father to suicide once he found out that the child was dead, that all strikes me as high suspicious. I am a mother. I have a four year old and a three year old. The thought of a mother having something to do with the death of her own child makes my blood run cold. Yes, there's been things that I wanted to do that I couldn't, places I wanted to go. But it's called being a responsible adult and prioritizing. I wrote the following poem just a couple of days after the Anthony verdict. If anyone wants to pass it along, please feel free to. The only thing I ask is that if you repost or reblog this some where, give credit.

It saddens me that you're gone.

I didn't know you at all.

But it still breaks my heart.

All the things you'll never get to do.

The places you'll never see.

Your life was cut short tragically.

By the one person who should have protected you.

We the people failed you, and for that I apologize.

It's comforting to know that you're safe.

But your safety shouldn't have come with such a high price.

Rest In peace little angel.

You will never be forgotten.

Your memory will live on.

We the people failed to give you justice.

No one that young should have their life cut short.

In the Memory of Caylee Marie Anthony 2005-2008